You Are At: AllSands Home > Lifestyles > How to get along with your mother-in-law
We all know and understand that we will all meet a few people in our lifetime that we do not get on with. In usual practices, the best (and most popular) idea is to disassociate yourself with them or just be pleasant rather that cause a scene every time you see them. But it’s hard to ignore or disassociate yourself from your mother-in-law.

The chances are that people would have noticed your dislike for her, so trying to hide it will get you nowhere. Of course this doesn’t mean being nasty is going to work either, but actually understanding what it is about her that you dislike will help you in the future.

Your husband wants to see his whole family unite. How do you think it makes him feel seeing the two most important women in his life bicker and argue on sight? A few guidelines and tips can help you to get along with your mother-in-law, after all she isn’t going anywhere so you’ll just have to live with her – you can make it easy or hard for yourself.

1. Sit down and talk to her without your husband or anyone else around. Try to let her know that you are willing to forget the past and move on. There is no point dwelling or going over the same argument, you’ll only go round in circles.

2. Try to think what actually started your dislike for her. Was it something she did or didn’t do, or perhaps the way she treated you? If you can understand this and talk about it you can get through the misunderstanding. She probably doesn’t know why you don’t like her.

3. Try to spend a little time together. To start with, try to find a common interest or maybe ask her about one of her interests. This will show her you want to sort out your differences and become closer.

4. Smile. A smile can melt anyone’s heart. Show her that you can be caring and giving. Show her exactly why her son fell in love with you. This will make it harder for her to dislike you.

5. Find out if there is anything that you have done to upset her. Apologize for any mistakes you have made and she will probably follow suit.

6. Remember that she gave life to your husband, so a little of her is in him. Think about how she is feeling. If he is her only son she probably feels envious of you getting all of his attention. Until she gets used to you being his wife, make sure you involve her in days out and activities. Make sure you save time for your own privacy as well, just make her feel that she is still wanted.

7. If all else fails, learn to live with each other. You may not think of her as a mother, but she is your husband’s mother. Bad-mouthing her or making snide comments when around your husband won’t help matters at all. Make a pact with her – agree that maybe she might not have chosen you as her son’s wife had she a choice, but he did, so the only way to live harmoniously is to get over it and move on.