Living With Parents: Moving Back In
Living with parents? I'll tell you what it's like and how to deal with it.
It happens to many people in the world. Around their late teens, early to mid twenties, they get jobs or get into colleges and move out of their childhood homes, away from mom and dad. It's a sudden burst of independence and the discovery of one's self, for the person who was so stifled by parental rules and such. So what happens when the situation changes and that now independent, found soul has to move back in with mom and dad?
The way your move goes may depend on your reason for going back. If your reason was financial, you have to face facts that you are now as dependent on mom and dad as you were 10 or more years ago. Sounds depressing doesn't it? Don't worry too much, there are many up sides to this situation. For one thing, remember that you have lived on your own so you know exactly how you like to live and that may help you to respect the way that mom and dad like to live. You are unlikely to do the things that you probably did as a teen, like leaving mom a sink full of dirty dishes or leaving your shoes in the middle of the doorway for dad to trip over. You are now more conscious of the way your parents live because they were not a part of your every day life for the time that you were out of the house. In turn, mom and dad will appreciate you for respecting their home and space, which may give you an even ground to stand on together, something that you didn't have as a teen or a child.
Not all people move back home for financial reasons, some do it for transitional ones. I transferred from college to another during the school year and moved in with my parents while I looked around for apartments. This takes away the stress of your parents knowing that you were financially unsucessful and now reliant upon them, but it does add the stress of reverting back to "teenagism," which was the period where dad waited on the front porch with a rifle in his hand. (Not that my dad ever really did that.) My dad does other things, like waiting up for me, asking me where I am going, and why so late. I finally had to tell him that though I appreciate all of his love, support, and concern, it would blow his mind if he knew where I was, how late I was out, and what I was doing for the two years that we lived apart. He then stopped asking me such questions.
Another less drastic approach to this problem is to simply let mom and dad know that you were responsible for yourself when you were living on your own, with nobody to ask you where you were going or when you would be home. Never yell during these discussions, instead, treat them like heart to hearts. Believe it or not, your parents went through these types of things too so they will understand if you let them.
My last bit of advice to you is to keep in mind that this will not last forever but it will affect you forever if you treat the situation the wrong way. Be delicate with your parents, they are people too and also understand that while you were off indulging in your independence in your own home, they were doing the same thing.